Someday, the majority of our sons will be married. We all hope that they will choose wisely and will find women who love God and with whom they can have a great marriage. My hope is that someday, my daughter-in-laws will be able to come to me and thank my husband and I for the wonderful gift that our sons are in their lives.
In order to have that happen, however, there are things that we can all be doing RIGHT NOW to help prepare our sons to be good spouses – which will, in turn, bless our future daughter-in-laws.
Here are 4 Ways to Bless Your Future Daughter-in-Law:
1. Pray for Her – Even though we don’t know who she is, we can and should be praying for her. We can pray for her relationship with her parents. Pray that she will guard her heart and her mind in Christ Jesus. We can pray that she will save herself for her future husband. And pray that she will be open to God’s leading in her life.
2. Pray for your Son – We can pray these same things for our son. Ask God to help us have a close and trusting relationship with him. Ask that we’ll make wise decisions for our son, and that we’ll know when we need to back off and let him make the decision for himself.
Pray that our sons won’t be conformed to the patterns of this world – and will be able to resist the pressure to give up their innocence before marriage. And above all, pray that our sons will have a strong relationship with God and that they will be sensitive and responsive to God’s promptings.
3. Train Your Son to Look for Ways to Bless Others – This is a step above simply following a chore chart and checking things off of a list. Start encouraging your son to have a heart which wants to be helpful. Teach him to look around and see what needs to be done – and then do it.
We’ve recently started working on this one at our house and I think this lesson will take awhile to really sink in. I’ve started by creating a task on my boys’ school sheet which says to “Help Mom with one thing each day.” Every day they are supposed to look around, see one thing that needs to be done and do it without prompting. So far, I’m having to look around with them and find something they can help me with. But my goal is that at some point, they will internalize this lesson and will develop eyes that naturally look around to see where they can be helpful.
4. Train Your Son to Say, “How Can I Help You Today?” – Wives appreciate having spouses who are willing to lend a hand. Even when your son doesn’t know what he can do to help you, train him to ask the question, “How Can I Help You Today?” This is accepted much more easily than hearing “Do You Need Help?”
For example, if I’m making dinner and my husband asks if I need help – but I see that he’s in the middle of something himself – or that he’s relaxing – I’m reluctant to “bother” him and I’m likely to say, “No, I’m good” whether or not I’d actually like some help.
If my husband walks out to the kitchen and says, “How can I help you?” there’s always something (often several things) that he can do to help. That phrase conveys more of a desire to help and someone who is just wanting to be directed – rather than someone who would rather not help unless you really NEED it.
Incorporating these habits into our homes will not only bless our future daughter-in-laws… they will also help to strengthen and enhance the relationships between ourselves and our sons.
Question: What do you think? Have you found other ways to bless your future daughter-in-law? Please leave a comment below.