Overview: Homeschooling doesn’t have to be as hard or worrisome as we sometimes make it. Here are 10 things I wish someone had told me my first year of homeschooling!
I homeschooled my sons for 17 years and I’m happy to say that I’m not the same person I was when I first started this adventure. The old me was much more uptight and rigid about my ideas of education. The old me was filled with worry and concern.
The old me was very self-conscious and unsure of herself.
Fortunately, as I look back, there are so many lessons that I’ve learned along the way. If I knew then what I know now, I could have saved myself a TON of grief.
Hopefully, the things I’ve learned will help you to avoid some common pitfalls I’ve fallen into during our homeschooling journey.
Here are 10 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me My First Year of Homeschooling:
1 – You don’t need a dedicated classroom
When we first started homeschooling, I remember being so excited to bring home desks for my boys. I set up a dedicated classroom for them in our basement.
I put up a bulletin board and a whiteboard. I displayed letters along the top edge of the wall. I set up a pretend store complete with priced grocery items and a cash register.
I tried to do everything I could to replicate what I could remember from my own kindergarten classroom.
What I didn’t know was how much more comfortable it would be for us to do our school work on the couch rather than sitting at desks. I didn’t understand that I’d be able to do laundry and dishes while teaching if my kids were at the dining room table rather than in the basement.
Or that my boys would learn so much more by going to the real grocery store with me than in the pretend one I tried to set up for them.
While it is nice to have a dedicated space to store homeschool books and materials, it isn’t always necessary or even desirable to have a dedicated classroom for learning.
Some people might disagree with me on this one but this has been my experience.
2 – Kids don’t need to sit still to learn
Some of the best learning takes place when kids are on the move. Plan plenty of field trips.
Be sure to include hands-on activities throughout your day. Try using a unit study about a subject which interests your children and reading real books rather than always using a textbook.
Make lessons fun whenever possible!
Learning doesn’t have to be dry and boring. The more energy and enthusiasm we pump into our day, the better our kids will remember what we’re trying to teach them.
3 – The curriculum isn’t in charge – You are!
When we first started homeschooling, I was extremely careful to do everything my teacher’s manual told me to do. I completed every lesson. I instructed my boys to do every suggested activity.
My curriculum was a harsh taskmaster.
After a few years, I was surprised to discover that you don’t even have to finish the textbook to be done for the year. In fact, schools consider that they are done if they complete 80% of the book.
Also, your teacher’s manual is only a guide. Take what is written in there as a suggestion and not a rule. You are the one who best knows your children and their needs.
If a certain curriculum is working well and your child is enjoying it, then feel free to stick with it. If you decide to ditch the textbooks and venture off with your own plan, that’s fine as well. There is no right or wrong way to homeschool. Do what works best for your family. You get to decide!
4 – Enjoy the moment
I’m the oldest child in my family, and I have a tendency to take things very seriously. I feel a huge weight on my shoulders because I want to be sure I’m doing things correctly.
I push myself pretty hard. I also have a tendency to push my boys pretty hard if I’m not careful.
When we first started homeschooling, my oldest son was not quite 2-years-old. Even though he was very young, I felt an enormous responsibility to create elaborate lesson plans and to have everything completely organized and just so.
Sometimes I was so concerned about planning for future lessons that I didn’t enjoy what was happening in the present. Our kids grow up very quickly.
It doesn’t always seem like it when they’re little and you’re deep in the trenches of motherhood. But time really does go by faster than you think.
Enjoy the time you have with your children. Live in the moment as much as possible.
Have fun with your kiddos!
5 – You won’t remember everything
This one is hard to believe, but you really won’t remember everything. Events that you think are engraved into your brain will become fuzzy over time.
Take lots of videos and pictures!
And don’t just wait to take them on special occasions. Take them when you’re hanging out around the house doing everyday things. Take them when your house is messy and your hair is uncombed. Don’t use filters all the time, for goodness sakes.
You’ll want to remember how your kids’ voices sound. How they toddled around the house when they were young. All of their various expressions.
When you’re old and gray, you’ll even want pictures of yourself interacting with your family.
When it comes to homeschooling, you’ll also want to keep some records of what you’ve covered, the books you have read, field trips you have taken, etc.
If your kids are older, then you need to keep even more elaborate records for them.
→ Related Content: My BEST Advice for Brand New Homeschoolers6 – They won’t remember everything
When my boys were little, we read through stacks and stacks of books. I made sure to read every cherished book I had from my childhood to them. We went on so many amazing and fun field trips.
And we had some wonderful discussions that I cherish.
Fast forward a few years and I was reminiscing with my boys about some of the stuff we had read together when they were younger. I brought up book title after book title and they couldn’t remember ever having read them.
They didn’t remember Blueberries for Sal or Little House on the Prairie. Egads!
The books they did remember were ones we read over and over and over. They remembered the ones we acted out such as We’re Going on a Bear Hunt and The Gingerbread Man.
Don’t be afraid to read a book more than once. Repeat field trips. Say things again and again.
Teach and reteach.
Just because you’ve done something once with your kids doesn’t mean they will always remember it. Don’t be afraid to do it again!
7 – It’s alright to reboot midyear
When you first start homeschooling, you will choose a curriculum. There’s no way to know whether this will work well for your family until you actually try it.
If it isn’t a good fit, then you are well within your rights to switch to something else.
In fact, it’s pretty typical for homeschoolers to come off of Christmas break each year wondering if they need to reboot. It’s perfectly fine to reevaluate, but try not to second guess yourself too much.
If things aren’t completely falling apart, it might be best to finish up with your current curriculum this year and switch to something different next year.
8 – You should care more about what God thinks and less about what people think
We have to follow our state laws to be sure we are homeschooling legally. But sometimes we get so wrapped up in trying to impress our in-laws, the people at church, or our friends that we forget who we are really supposed to be doing this for.
If we are homeschooling for the glory of God, then we can let go of what everyone else thinks.
What a relief!
Ask God to give you wisdom and insight into how He wants you to prepare your kids for their adult years. This includes much more than just book learning.
Character building and life skills are also important matters to address.
9 – Don’t forget about you
Homeschooling takes a lot of energy. It requires discipline and effort and frankly, it’s a lot of work.
As moms, it’s natural for us to put everyone else in our lives before ourselves. And that’s overall a good thing.
But we also need to make sure that we remember to take care of ourselves as well.
Some homeschool moms build some margin into their day by taking lunch breaks while their kids are doing something quietly in their rooms. Others take a few minutes for themselves when their husbands get home from work.
It’s important to find ways to de-stress regularly so that you don’t become completely overwhelmed.
10 – It’s a marathon, not a sprint
There are so many fun educational options, extracurricular activities, field trip ideas, and hands-on lessons that are available to homeschoolers. It can be tempting to want to take advantage of all of them!
We can run ourselves ragged trying to give our kids an amazing educational experience.
I’m a huge advocate of adding in hands-on learning and field trips to keep learning interesting – but I also maintain that you need to have downtime as well. Remember that if you plan to homeschool all the way through your child’s high school years, you will have 12-13 years of homeschooling ahead.
And that’s if you are only homeschooling one child. Add a few more kids into the mix and your homeschooling years will be even longer.
Please don’t take on so much that you or your kids burn out within a year or two. You don’t want to get so tired that you throw in the towel when they hit the teen years.
Or give your kids so much to do that they actually want to go to public school to get a break!
I hope these lessons that I’ve learned along the way will prove helpful to you as well. Remember that homeschooling doesn’t just help your kids learn and grow – it will also help you to grow.
There is not one right way to homeschool. Choose what seems best for your family at the time – and don’t be afraid to make adjustments as along the way.
I love this quote from Maya Angelou: “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” I completely agree with her wise advice!
How many years have you been homeschooling? Do you have any other advice you would share with a first year homeschooler? Please leave a comment below.
My daughter is only 9 months old,but I cannot wait to homeschool! I will keeps these tips in mind for sure!
Oh, that’s wonderful, Emily. I’m glad I was able to help you out from the very start. Enjoy these years with your daughter. 🙂
I’ve been the same way for the past 2 years and we just stated this school year! My daughter it 2.5 and we’re having so much fun. It is NEVER to early to start and it will be here for you so much sooner than you imagine!!
We have been homeschooling for 11 years now and have 9 more to go. All your tips are definitely true. I am thankful for extended family who have supported us by giving books and magazines as gifts through the years. I think our sons have learned more this way than by all my teaching and curriculum.
Thanks, Darlene. It’s always good to get confirmation from other homeschoolers. I appreciate that! And yes, isn’t it amazing how much our kids learn when we aren’t even trying to teach something to them?!? I can’t tell you how many times my boys have told me a tidbit of information and I’ve asked them, “Where’d you learn that?!?” Because I know that it wasn’t anything they learned from me! LOL
great tips! So true. I’ve learned some of the same lessons….the hard way lol!
Oh yeah. I hear ya! I learn most of my lessons that way, too, unfortunately… 😉
Thank you for this Michelle, such good timing. We are half way through our school year and just coming out of winter here so there’s a bit of cabin fever going on! I need the reminder about field trips and hands on activities, my boys definitely need that. A great point too about the fact that schools view a book is done if 80% of it is completed, I will keep that in mind.
Thanks for all those tips.
Fiona
You are so welcome, Fiona! How nice for you – just coming out of winter. We’ve had a CRAZY HOT summer here in Michigan. Much hotter than normal. So, I’m actually more eager for fall than normal. Enjoy your extra field trips! 🙂
Hello! I am thinking about homeschooling. I have a two sons: 3 1/2 and 1 1/2. I see that you are from Michigan. So am I! A big question I have is, do you connect with other homeschool families with children of similar ages? If so, how did you come into contact with them?
Do you live in West Michigan? If so, the Homeschool Building Newsletter is a great way to find out what’s going on in the area. I can give you more details if you do. There are also various Facebook groups and homeschool support groups you can join. Parents often coordinate field trips and play dates and park days using Facebook groups. Let me know where you live and if you’re anywhere near me I’ll see if I can get you connected with some moms who have younger kids. 🙂
We are new to homeschooling but homeschool on the screened porch…it’s a wonderful spot. Thanks for all the great tips
That’s wonderful, Heather! We don’t have a screened porch but I LOVE to homeschool when all of our windows are open. Even just the seemingly little aspect of having fresh air makes learning so much more pleasant. Have a WONDERFUL year and you’re very welcome!
#2 and #9 were two that would have saved me a lot of heartache in the beginning. Great reminders here!
Oh yes! Those were two that I learned the hard way as well. Especially #9. It’s so hard to remember ourselves when we’re mostly focused on our families. And I think that homeschooling just compounds that problem! I’ve had conversations with several moms who didn’t think they should put their marriage before their children – let alone take care of themselves… ever. But it’s so easy to get burned out if we never take the time to recharge. Thanks so much for stopping by, Misty!
I agree, great tips. If you count pre-school, then I’ve been homeschooling for about 15 years. I’ve been thinking lately of writing a similar post. 🙂
I was definitely more rigid in the beginning, too. Even though I’ve mellowed out, I do think being a rigid planner may have helped me get into a routine so I was able to stick with it. I think it’s better to start out rigid and become more flexible than to start out too flexible and have to become more rigid. Maybe that’s just me, though!!
I’d want to tell first year homeschoolers to continually lean not on your own understanding but TRUST the Lord!!! And continually seek Him for guidance. I constantly had to remember that homeschooling was definitely a calling from God, especially during tough times. 🙂
Amen! Great advice, Brandi!!! It would be incredibly hard to try to homeschool without relying on God to give us wisdom and strength and patience and perseverance, etc.
I have been homeschooling since my oldest was 5, and now he is 11, so I guess I have been homeschooling for about 6 years now. I keep praying God shows me what He wants me to teach my kids and I keep finding that I learn more in the process as well. I realized one reason I homeschool is so I can connect with my kids in meaningful ways, and love to learn. Some days they are all on board and others it is a struggle (especially with the older ones). I find discipline is hard in my own life and trying to teach them that sometimes falls by the wayside. But then I look back over what we have done so far and have seen what they have learned and am blown away! I thank God for co-ops to supplement where I have lacked and I keep praying about their English courses. Math seems to be better but English! oh my! My strength goes more into history and geography and so they definitely get a lot of that, and so I try to find curriculum that has that mixed with everything else. It is definitely interesting! My biggest heart is to have my kids want to learn and enjoy the process but know that at times they will have to do things they don’t enjoy. But cherishing everyday is so essential! Sorry I just went on and on…did any of it make sense? lol
Yes, of course it makes sense! We all have areas in which we excel and areas we don’t cover quite as fully. But you know what?!? God isn’t surprised by that. And He gave our kids to US specifically to raise. And He knows what He’s doing. So it’ll be alright. I’m totally with you that connecting with our kids is huge for homeschoolers. And the desire to pass on a love of learning is also key. With that, they can fill in any gaps they need to when the time comes. No worries! (BTW that’s easy for me to say to you – but harder when I apply it to my own life and my own boys.) Thanks so much for stopping by, Elizabeth!
We’re not yet officially homeschooling, but I tell you, I certainly can’t remember most things that happen most days with a 3yo and a 10mo. They’re so busy and full and bouncy and Loud! But, I do remember some things and I’m glad that (so far) I feel good that we don’t have any dedicated space to learn or practice, because everywhere is a place to learn and practice! 🙂
You’re right, Kendall. It’s impossible to remember everything. I remember when my boys were babies and I was so busy chasing around after them… but they did so many cute things that I didn’t want to forget. I used to wish that there was a way for me to push a button on my head which would take a picture of whatever I was seeing. Maybe someone will actually invent that someday?!?
this is our second year and I’m still trying to slow down, But what really kicked in fast was lessons in bed. And thank the heavens for Wifi & You tube. Haven’t done much field trips yet there doesn’t seem to be the time our Home Ed community is huge and so many activities going on. But must really put the effort in. Thank you for your artical as I find I’m always question myself did I do the right thing, is he learning enough…..
Yes, it’s easy to fall into the trap of constantly questioning ourselves. Sounds like you’re going a great job, Carol. Hope you have a wonderful second year. And thanks for stopping by! 🙂
Yeah… To teach children at home does not always necessarily required to sit them down. They just have to learn with fun. Even playing around can be learning.
I’ve been home schooling 17 years now. One thing I’m still learning is that we ALL have learning style preferences, strengths and weaknesses. I’m getting better at recognizing those in my children. If I had my way, I’d school in the kitchen, baking and reading books to one another and having discussions. But I have acquiesced this year to the preferences of my kids, who expressed they want a learning space without distractions where we can just focus on lessons for a time each day. So I tell them, “Sure! Let’s play school together! I’ll make up lessons and be the teacher if you agree to do whatever I assign without complaining.” Everyone’s happy having companionship and discussion in a “class” together as we explore various unit studies for 2-3 hours each day, then everyone works independently after that, coming to me for coaching when needed. All that to say, while a schoolroom isn’t required and learning isn’t limited to it, sometimes it’s fun and even fitting for certain learning personalities to “play school” together.
Thanks so much for sharing that with us, Beth! You’re right. How wonderful that you listened to your kids and were willing to try out something new. I love how homeschoolers have the freedom to do things however they work best for their family!
I didn’t homeschool as long as you have, but this is so familiar. Great article!
Thanks! 🙂
Agree with these. My husband and I are 2nd generation homeschoolers. We have will be entering our 7th year in the Fall. We have many to go with our 4 kiddos.
Thanks so much for checking in! I love to hear from 2nd generation homeschoolers. I hope you and your kids have a wonderful year!
This was a what my eyes and brain need to read this am… as I navigate homeschooling for the FIRST time and researching galore. Yet to pick co-op, books, study material,etc…. Um, yep, feeling overwhelmed by ALL the options… BUT God clearly spoke to me that I had NOT invited him with this details. I was flying solo, and need to pray for guidance. Then reading this, so helpful. thank you soooo much!!! I love in Orange County CA and we have so MANY options resources I will be working at not doing too much…. We are leaving public school system as my son enters 3rd grade… So praying for much adjustments and finding programs that are a good fit for us…
I’m so glad He directed you to my site, Katherine. Yes, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed as there are so many voices out there who are well intentioned… but it can become quite confusing. God will guide and direct you as you dip your feet into the waters of homeschooling. I’m excited for you!!! BTW – You may want to follow me on Facebook or YouTube as well as I’m trying to share plenty of encouragement for homeschoolers on those channels:
Facebook = https://www.facebook.com/HomeschoolYourBoys/
YouTube = https://www.youtube.com/homeschool-your-boys